How Post-Divorce Families Can Have a Relaxed Thanksgiving
As Thanksgiving approaches, divorced parents may be feeling the pressure to make it work. Who will the children spend Thanksgiving with? Will new partners be invited to the celebrations? Will you be risking disaster if you attempt a family Thanksgiving?
Rather than letting these decisions keep you up at night, there’s no shame in getting help. Whether you’re recently divorced, currently going through a divorce, or struggling with a difficult co-parenting arrangement, mediation is a neutral space in which you can negotiate a conflict-free holiday with your kids.
Divorce Options San Diego is a full-service mediation firm that can help you work through your divorce on a number of levels, from practical to legal to emotional. As San Diego divorce mediation experts with psychoanalytical expertise, we can assess such factors as your children’s developmental levels. We can also offer assistance with the practical matters of your divorce, such as event planning and managing your post-divorce life (including career and life coaching, if desired).
If you’re facing any of the following issues, mediation can help you determine what’s right for you and your kids.
How Do I Handle My In-Laws?
In-laws can say insensitive things at the Thanksgiving dinner table that can hurt kids and cause conflict. Mediation can help you establish coping mechanisms and boundaries so your kids don’t have to be subject to confusing influences from your in-laws.
What About Travel Arrangements?
If your children are traveling abroad with your ex-spouse, you’ll need to prepare travel documents and custody papers. In mediation, you can discuss these matters and get your children prepared to travel.
Which Traditions Should We Stick To?
Insensitivity to religious or cultural traditions can lead to kids having a divided experience and feeling caught between their parents. Mediation can work with parents’ emotional and cultural affiliations to find common ground.
Is It Appropriate to Invite New Partners to Celebrations?
Whether you or your ex is the one with the new partner, this decision is one to be approached very carefully. It’s something that can be discussed with your partner in light of family politics, your children’s developmental levels, and your partner’s sensitivities. The solution doesn’t have to be black and white, and any number of options, such as modifying sleeping arrangements and introducing your new partner to your kids in a gradual way, can be explored to suit your comfort level.
How Do We Pay for the Celebrations?
It’s quite common for divorced parents to have unequal incomes. If children have to travel for Thanksgiving or fun activities are planned, parents may have to decide how to pay for the events. Discussing these things rather than sweeping them under the rug shows respect for your co-parent and helps you decide on the appropriate monetary contribution from each parent.
Divorced parents don’t have to make Thanksgiving perfect for their children. Kids can sense when their parents are making an honest effort. Modeling good behavior by working through adversity and identifying your emotional biases is better for your kids. Working with mediators with psychoanalytical expertise can ground your discussions and help you proceed with care.
Our Services and How We Can Help
At Divorce Options San Diego, we are highly qualified professional San Diego divorce mediators and certified financial planners with psychoanalytical expertise. Our mediators are caring, educated professionals who build divorce around conflict resolution, closure, and practical solutions for your future life.
At Divorce Options San Diego, we reframe divorce as an opportunity to generate creative, optimized solutions for your future and your kids’ future. We never litigate. We don’t do adversarial work, and we never represent one spouse against another. We are a one-stop shop providing a bundle of essential divorce services, from paperwork, court documents, and financial analysis to divorce transition coaching, life coaching, and interior design. We cater to those with busy lives who want the best for themselves and their children.
San Diego Divorce Options puts a high premium on a peaceful, child-centered divorce. We use developmental psychology, attachment theory, psychology of grieving, and family systems psychology to help you and your children through the difficult emotional transition. We help divorcing parents draft multiphase parenting plans that consider their children’s developmental needs. We help co-parents build parenting plans that will withstand the challenges of parenting, even if long-distance or international locations are involved, and we can assist you with the tools to stay connected to your children even if you aren’t the primary caregiver. At Divorce Options San Diego, we emphasize an efficient, caring process that leaves out no detail relevant to your emotional, financial, and legal situations, which leaves you free to get on with your life and care for your kids and yourself, both during and after your divorce. We have offices in Solana Beach, CA, but we can work with you remotely at your convenience via telephone, video conferencing apps, and other forms of electronic communication. Please contact us at (858) 281-2628 for a discreet and confidential consultation to see how we can help.
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