Going through a divorce involves working with your spouse to reach an agreement on important matters such as the division of property. Naturally, it’s easy to find yourself at odds with the other person, especially if your relationship was volatile toward the end of your marriage. Fortunately, entering mediation means you have a new chance to develop a creative plan that allows you both to move forward. The team from Divorce Options San Diego—professionals who offer expert divorce mediation San Diego couples rely on for creative divorce solutions—offer these six tips that can help you reach a final agreement that leaves everyone feeling heard, respected, and ready to move on.
1. Commit to Making Mediation Work
Divorce mediation relies heavily on both parties being willing to reach a compromise. While your mediator is great at alleviating tension and keeping things focused on the task at hand, you must be willing to participate. Show up for your appointments ready to discuss important topics without allowing yourself to lose control over your reactions.
2. Do Your Homework
You’ll need to bring some information to your appointments. For instance, it’s common to have the mediator request things such as income statements to help with the decision-making. Plan to gather this type of information before each appointment so you don’t get hung up waiting for an essential document.
3. Plan Time to Relax Before & After Appointments
You should treat mediation as you would any other potentially stressful event. If possible, do some deep breathing before your appointments, or plan for an enjoyable activity to take place afterward, such as going for a jog. Practicing some self-care now can promote a positive attitude that makes it easier to work through stressful decisions.
4. Try to See Your Spouse’s Side
The ultimate goal of mediation is to help both parties reach an agreement that satisfies everyone’s needs. However, it’s normal for your needs to conflict with your spouse’s. When this happens, try to see things from his or her perspective. A little give-and-take is often necessary for an agreement to be reached.
5. Know Your Boundaries
While you do need to be willing to compromise, you also need to remember that you’ll live with these decisions for a long time. Know where you need to draw the line to ensure your future happiness. Having clear boundaries can help you negotiate the issues that really matter to you.
6. Keep the Ultimate Goal in Mind
Your ultimate goal is to end your marriage with mutual respect and the financial means necessary to begin your new life. You may also have goals such as protecting your children’s happiness as you work through the mediation process. Keeping these goals in mind can help you work through each new issue that arises so you can reach an agreement on how to handle your divorce.
All the practical, legal, financial, and psychological aspects of fair, respectful divorce agreements can be managed by Divorce Options San Diego’s experienced, trustworthy divorce mediators. San Diego couples can rely on our comprehensive process, which is so thorough there won’t be a need for attorneys. To learn how we can help you with every facet of your divorce, call us today at (858) 281-2628.