How to Approach Your Marital Separation
If things aren’t working out between you and your spouse, it may be a good idea to start planning for a separation. Taking the time to make plans before you actually leave can help you avoid a lot of headaches later on. It’s especially helpful if you and your partner can sit down and discuss these plans, but this may not be the wisest course in all marriages. Here are some things you need to keep in mind when you’re finalizing your separation plans, brought to you by the experienced professionals from Divorce Options San Diego, divorce mediators San Diego couples trust to develop creative solutions that leave both parties satisfied and ready to move on with their lives.
Carefully Consider Goals and Timelines
The first thing you need to do when you start considering a separation is think about what you hope to get out of it. Do you want you and your partner to take a break and give your marriage time to heal, or do you want the separation to be the first step toward a divorce? Do you want an informal separation, or are you ready for a formal legal separation that’s filed with the court? When does the separation go into effect, and how long do you hope it will last? Are you going to tell your partner now or wait until it’s time for one of you to leave? Setting clear expectations for you and your partner can make the separation go more smoothly.
Make Sure You Provide Stability for Your Children
A separation is a volatile time, so if you have children, it’s very important to include them in your plans. Some couples find it helpful to let the kids stay in the family home while the parents rotate back and forth between an apartment. You can also plan to do things like visit usual vacation spots, keep up with afterschool activities, and maintain your children’s normal schedule to help them feel secure.
Begin Separating Finances
Finances are one of the biggest causes of conflict during a separation, so it’s a good idea to go ahead and begin splitting them. It’s easiest when both spouses are employed so you can both create private bank accounts and handle things separately. However, if one spouse isn’t employed, you may want to discuss a monthly budget to help things go smoothly.
Make Sure You Have Access to Important Items and Documents
You won’t actually divide all your shared possessions until the divorce, but it can be a good idea to get a start on this by ensuring you have access to anything you need. Make sure things like your pet’s registration, the title for your car, and other legal proofs of ownership include your name. For shared accounts, include your name or email address on them. Gather your birth certificate, passport, family heirlooms, and other difficult-to-replace items in an area where you can easily pick them up and take them with you when you leave.
If couples do choose to divorce and want the opportunity to make the process as smooth, respectful, and amicable as possible, there’s an amazing alternative to the animosity and high costs of traditional divorce: divorce mediation. San Diego couples can rely on Divorce Options San Diego’s experienced divorce mediators to handle every aspect of their divorces, and there will be no need to spend a small fortune on litigation. To learn more about how we can help with legal separation and divorce mediation, call the expert mediators at Divorce Options San Diego today at (858) 281-2628.